Should I go out for a drink and risk going to Czech class tomorrow morning hungover or stay home bored out of my mind and wishing I'd gone? hummmm.........

So yesterday I registered for my first exam. I was warned to be in front of my computer when the registration opened and now I understand why. It was like dogs to a bone 0.0

I seriously doubt I would have managed to get registered in the date I wanted if I hadn't clicked that button on the second I did. Jeez people, it's 2 months away...

My friends are out of town (and the country for that matter) this weekend so I'm left here to study about bacteria and shit and stare out the window. It's really foggy today. I can't wait till February. If it all goes well for me, and a certain someone actually manages to get his ass across the Atlantic, I get to travel around Europe for almost an entire month. With said person.
Who better get his ass here.

Back to microscopic critters now...

You know it's time to hightail it out of a convo when the crazy guy in your class (who just came talking to you for the first time ever) asks you to share a scholarship account "scam" of sorts and then asks that wonderful question: "don't you trust me?"

Ya think?

I’ve had a very emotional week. It’s like everything bad that could have happened made sure it did starting Tuesday night. I had a brilliant Tuesday, great presentation, spent some good times with my classmates, with my friends after classes, I was in heaven. Then I got home, found my new roommate (though that’s not so bad, she’s really nice, but she came in a very bad time and it was completely unexpected), and I spent a couple of hours chatting to a friend while he waited for his family to call him about his dad. We’ve been waiting for those news for weeks, and they were as terrible as they could be, his dad has cancer. And chances are he won’t last very long. I didn’t know what to do or say, and my friend wanted to be left alone so after calling someone who lives close to him I did. I didn’t want him to be alone.

Besides all this I managed to get into a giant fight with my boyfriend, he didn’t speak to me for a couple of days after that. I haven’t been acting very gracefully towards him lately. I wish I had someone I could talk to about him but I don’t. None of my friends know anything about him, its something I just don’t talk about to anyone. I’ve only just recently told B I have a boyfriend, and I only vaguely told him about the actual situation. It’s not something I expect anyone to understand, I’ve only told like, two people about him and they both told me I was crazy and to move on and get a life. So yeah, it’s not something I can discuss with my friends. Which is a shame, because it would really help me if I could talk about it to anyone besides him. He kinda needs the pressure off of him for a while you know? I found a community here that helps but I wish I could talk to a friend too…

So, so far I’ve just decided to stop focusing so much on him and spending as much of my time as possible out of the house. It’s the best thing I could possibly do until my emotions calm the fuck down. I think I’m getting creepy now.

So tomorrow’s a holiday here and in Slovakia as well, November 17^th was the day the Velvet Revolution started in Czechoslovakia exactly 20 years ago. It was the revolution that finally rid them of Communism so as I’m sure, tonight’s gonna be crazy. Shame I don’t have money or I’d totally go out. If there’s one thing Czechs know, it’s how to drink. And make beer. They totally rock at that.

And I just noticed that I seem to always start entries with “I’ve had a ________ week.” lol?

So I've had an interesting week. The one before last week that is. This week sucked. But I had an autopsy of sorts thursday morning, that was kinda cool. It would have been AWESOME if only the room we were in didn't look like something out of a Hostel movie. Seriously. And we had to stand, all scrubbed up, and it smelled so bad in there. It smelled like shit. seriously. We only had a couple organs in the room with us, but in the next room they had the body, and we could smell it from where we were. And then the doctor went and opened the gall bladder to show us all the cool gall stones (it looked like sand! Covered in slime!) and oh my god the smell again! But overall, it was pretty damn cool!!! *-*

Anyway, I've watched Saw VI with my friend Vi, who came to spend a week here (YAY!!) and HOLY SHIT it was awesome! From start to finish, I was glued to that screen!!! When it was over, the two of us just let out the breath we'd been holding throughout the entire movie it seemed and just squealed in delight, repeating the word AWESOME ad nauseum. And then we went outside to smoke a cigarette, in total nirvana. I guess that's what an hour and a half long orgasm feels like.


WATCH IT!

I've had a bad week. And a bad weekend, and I can already see it's gonna go on for the next week. I'm sick, I'm on my period, I'm depressed, I feel miserable. I have work to do, I need to present a topic on the Starling Principle (Physiology shit) to my class this tuesday and I haven't started yet. I don't see how I'll present it when I can barely talk but whatever. Also, I hate doing presentations. I have terrible stage fright. I had a Czech test last week which I didn't study for because really, I have more important things to study for. So I just wrote some shit on some tiny papers which I couldn't use in the end because the teacher wouldn't stop pacing around me and anyone else with "aids" (the helping kind, not the disease kind) so I expect to have to do it again... And yes, I'll study the fucking grammar next time..... -___- Stupid language.

In the midst of all this, I managed to explode at The Sire because he's not giving me as much attention as I want, and me being the paranoid bitch that I am, completely spazzed and told him things I shouldn't have while bawling my eyes out. And continuously blowing my nose and coughing, Thank god it was a text convo... I feel so sexy... SO I think he's mad at me now. I chose a bad time to have a hissy-fit, he hasn't been very well either. For different reasons. Why won't someone just punch my lights out when I do stupid shit? Granted I'd have severe brain damage by now, but think of how much better the world around me would be now.

Now please excuse me, I really need to study or I'll get lynched by an angry mob. :) Seriously.

Sooooo a bunch of shit's happened and I've been way too lazy to post anything about it lol.

Cuz that's how I roll. :/

So, over the week before last I'd planned with my friend B to go over to the city we both used to study in, about 5 hours away by car. We both moved here for different reasons but I'm glad we did, it's just that much cooler. But I still have all my friends back there so obviously, when B's girlfriend Vi said she'd be coming over here by car to show her cousin around the city for a day or 2, we took the chance and drove back with her. I'd spent the couple of days before Friday (thats Wednesday and Thursday) calling people so everything would go smoothly. I called my good friend and big brother figure M for a place to stay, which went ok, he actually let me sleep in his bed which is, in itself, astounding D:

And then I called my friend whose name actually also starts with an M but whom I'll refer to as PR, (because of an inside joke we had. Which I shall not reveal =D) so I could go over to her house during the weekend to get all the stuff I'd left there (books, coat hangers, some clothes, towels, a scale, a lamp etc etc you know, shit I need NOW). She said ok, she was busy but she'd be there to open the door so I could go and get my shit no prob! She still has exams to do so she really is quite busy and doing odd sleeping schedules.

So on Friday afternoon we were off!!
After the long ride there, we went to dinner at the medieval-like restaurant and asked for what basically was a big pail of meat of all sorts. Also, delicious. And beer. Lots of it, can't be in CZ and not have beer. I think its actually against the law or something.

After dinner, they dropped me off at M's house, Said hi to him and his roommate GMan (I LOVE HIM!!! X3) and then litterally threw everything on the floor and changed in like, 2 minutes into mah night gear, took my makeup pouch and ran back down with M to go get all purdy n shit at Vi's house. M went his own way to start getting fucked up earlier. He likes getting fucked up. Gman stayed home getting fucked up in his own shadowy ways. And I went to Vi's and finished getting ready. After that I got that typical thing where my night's a little blurry and I don't remember things so well lol. We took Vi's cousin around town, showing her all the cool places to go out to etc etc. At around 4 am we stopped at "the typical one" where I found M along with a few other people I knew. He was nice and happy by then. I stuck around with him till he finally gave over the keys to his appartment, at 10 in the freaking morning -_- And he still stayed out.

I spent most of saturday trying to call PR, but got absolutely nothing out of it. Went to lunch with GMan, who like everybody else in this world plays Mafia Wars on facebook. He tried to get me to join but I know me, online games are the worse thing I can possibly get into. So no Mafia Family for me. Later I went to Vi's again to get ready and when we were 10 minutes from leaving to a friend's house for dinner PR finally decided to answer the freaking phone! We decided it would be better to get my stuff the next morning, before I had to get on a bus outta there so we left it at that. We girls got out, B stayed back working on his musicz, and when we were halfway tho the guy's house, we get a phonecall asking us to go get MOAR WINE. Vi and her cousin were both in heels and the closest place that sold alcohol at that hour was still a few blocks away so, valiantly, my trusty biker boots walked me there and back to the guy who shall be called A's house (is this getting confusing yet?) A is an awesome cook when it comes to the grill... and grill he did... delicious ribs... and wine. Lots of wine.

Czechs looked on as suddenly a big group of loud foreign people came out of nowhere into the streets and strutted around as though the city was theirs. Muahaha. So anyway, B was supposed to DJ at this new nightclub he'd actually never been to yet, me, Vi and a couple other girls were supposed to stay at the door getting entrance fees and stamping (well, writting actually, no stamps yet) the hands of the students coming to the party. I was sleepy from all the wine and MEAT so I needed me some vodka RedBull goodness. Which was promptly stolen by a drunk freshman... who didn't pay me a mojito like I told him to... he's lucky I'll probably never see him again, Cloud does not like it when people take her alcohol!! >.<

In the middle of all the fun, and all the closing of the BIG HUGE HEAVY METALIC DOORS that big-assed stupid people kept leaving open, letting all the cold in, I managed to jam my thumb in said BIG HUGE HEAVY METALIC DOORS. It hurt like a motherfucking bitch, my nail's still purple and sore. I spent the next hour with ice on my thumb and alcohol down my throat. And then I went dancing till they closed down the place and kicked us all out.

The next morning I called PR. And called, and called, and texted, and called, and nothing. So i shrugged, got on the bus and got back, with nothing new in my bags except an awesome big Hoegaarden mug I "borrowed" from one of the clubs we was at on saturday. I collect beer mugs, didn't you know? :3

I talked to The Sire, he missed me, I missed him, he said he wants to come and visit me in the next couple of months, I said no wai!!! He's still busy as ever, but still giving me all the sweetest musics in the world. Like Air's latest album, have you listened to it yet? It's fantastic! I love my babeh <3

A couple of days after I arrived, I finally got the balls that I know no one else in these 2 rooms would have, and bought a plunger and went crazy on the shower. I don't want to talk about it. A few hours after that, I met one of the girls from the room next to mine (we share said shower and bathroom) and she nonchalantly told me it would be nice of me if I'd cleaned the bathroom.

...

Ok, I'll clean the bathroom... It'll be so clean you'll be able to freakin drink from the toilet!! Even though I didn't even notice it when you supposedly cleaned it (must have been one hell of a job). So now it's all sparkly and pretty. And what did she decide to do today? Wash the dishes in there... THERE'S A KITCHEN ON THE FLOOR. IT HAS A SINK ESPECIALLY DESIGNED TO DO THE DISHES!! Please don't go doing that on the sink (which is also inside the shower lol) that I just spent hours scrubbing and slaving over!! ;_; Baw...

So anyway, now, a week after all this, here I am. I have 80 pages to read for a seminar tomorrow, I've just had a big mug of the nastiest soluble coffee money can buy, and I want a cigarette but I dont want to go outside cause it's cold. I love college and dorm life <3


Oh lol, while I was writting this, PR called me to appologize for not picking up the phone etc etc. I love her. She said she'd rent a car with a few more people and she'd bring my stuff over when she came to visit <3


Wow that was long o.0

So apparently I get the room to myself, at least for now. My roommate was supposed to come yesterday but no sign of her so far so I assume she decided to  go live at a flat or another room. Oh well!
I just went out to buy washing powder and softener, since I'd been waiting for her to get here so we could buy that stuff together. And then I walked a couple of blocks carrying a big, clanky clothes hanger thing back to the student halls. And my clothes are currently being washed <3

I start classes tomorrow, and before what will undoubtedly be a pathology OD day-long session, I still have to go talk to a bunch of people regarding my schedule changes and student card. And the day after I have to go get my bus card. And take a friend to do some stuff too.


I love busy days!

So I'm in 3rd year now, kinda, plus leftovers and stuff. All things checked out. It's gonna be hell this year I got so much shit to do D:

I guess I'll deal with it somehow, I have to. Hopefully in Jan-Feb I'll have a couple weeks free and I'll be able to travel. I'm keeping my fingers crossed X3

My dad called me earlier saying my fish Judas (that's Associate Professor Iscariot to you) did a suicide attempt. Or a flight attempt, I dunno, he's crazy. He jumped out of the aquarium, probably by the use of divine teleportation or something because the covers were on (or so he said). He was found inside a box next to the aquarium, gasping for air. A true miracle that my cat didn't find it before my mom did. I think he misses me lol. Poor Judas...

Oh wow, its NORMAL! The dorm room is NORMAL! Well kinda, the bathroom's weird. The sink is in the shower o.0

Oh well, could be so much worse, I think I can get used to it, hell, I might actually like it! (lol)

I'm walking toward malnutrition, I need to buy some pans and get cookin'. Oh yeah! There's a kitchen for each corridor! WOO!


Well, as eastern european student residencies go, I think I got pretty damn lucky. It's so quiet tho... So Czech

My last seafood dinner! How I will miss you! :'(

Delicious Seafood Rice!


Delicious Xarém! (Corn porridge, tastes so much
better than it sounds, trust me :P)                                                   We beat them sarge! XD
   

Post-War                                                                                               I'll miss you <3

Next wednesday I'm leaving. The more I look at the stuff I have to do this year the more scared I get.
And then there's the stuff I want to do.
I want to go to him in february. If he comes here, I want to hop on a bus and meet him wherever. I want this year to be done and fast, I want to meet at least one person that's not a complete asshole there. I wanna meet czech people so I can finally learn that fucking language properly. And I don't have the time for any of these.

I wish I was stronger. Smarter. I wish you were here. I need you.

Ok, so at least now I know I'm not gonna be homeless. Finally got an email saying I'd have accommodation, now to wait till friday to know exactly WHERE...


It's funny, I had a nightmare about the dorm last night. It looked more like a group of stone houses, stone gardens around them and stuff. I have way too many dreams about dorms, last year I had one where the Residency Hall resembled this:



Except you also had to squeeze through holes to move from room to room. Mine was at the top of a tower.

It was awesome.

About 2 weeks from now I kiss my friends and family goodbye and plunge back into eastern europe... By myself... The only 2 people I know there won't arrive till later so I'm basically gonna be completely alone in a dorm room, (I hope its better than the last one or I'm really gonna cry...) with no internet for I don't know how long and with nothing to do except clean up the room and walk around aimlessly so I get to know the city... I'm gonna go crazy... I'm used to having people I know and love around me all the time, it's comforting and safe, I'm terrified. I miss home already...

They better be quick setting up my connection or I'll explode. I need it to talk to my Sire. I need to talk to The Sire or I go The Crazy.


I guarantee it.

I wish I knew what it is I'm supposed to know.

I wish I wasn't so clueless. I keep looking for it and thinking about it, but I don't even know what I'm looking for. I guess I don't pay enough attention to details, I'm sorry. I wish I had. I wish you weren't mad at me now.

I'm going back home tomorrow, exam done, friends seen, hung out and drunk with them, in one occasion jumped around a club like a bunny after them cuz that's how I roll :)

I've already bought local beer for my dad to try, he likes trying out different beers, tons of chocolates for everyone and becherovka for me and my friends. To drink very VERY cold I've been told.

I went to a sushi restaurant today, I'd walked past it on my way home from the exam a couple days ago, and I'd been wanting to go since then. They have take out!!! :3 I was so happy, cause the city I used to study in before had no japanese restaurants at all, there are 2 very good ones just around campus which is <3.  So the guy I talked to (he spoke english weeeee) was really really nice, it's amazing how nice people are here, I'm not used to nice czechs. Or showered  czechs for that matter. While he prepared my feast he told me he'd studied in London and how much cooler it was there, and that he hated the public transport system here cause it doesnt rock as much. I told him he should be happy because back home it's so much worse. I actually think it's pretty neat here actually, theres always a bus or a tram near you, its perfect!

He gave me 2 nigiri pieces for free :) It was all delicious.


Its a shame I have to leave so soon, I was just starting to look around... :/ Oh well, Il'll have like, 12 days or so to walk around aimlessly in september so I can't complain. For now, I'm gonna enjoy my summer, It'll be the last decent summer I'll probably have in the next few years.


But it'll be worth it.


~Clawd

She's baaaaaack :)

In 5 days I'll know...